The bike ride never actually happened yesterday. I had my biking helmet on, my cell-phone ready. Then one of my mom’s cousins stopped by to talk with my mom about the funeral and such, and suddenly I didn’t feel much like biking any more.
Instead I called up Nicole, and we spent the day with thoughts and memories of my Memere. We went for a 4-mile walk and I felt this strange sense of peace but sadness all at the same time. I was so glad to have someone to share the day with me, because I honestly don’t feel like being alone right now. Too much time to think.
It’s funny, I didn’t feel much like cooking yesterday (I would have been perfectly happy serving cereal for breakfast, lunch and dinner to be completely honest!), but somehow I feel happiest and most content when I’m in the kitchen. I think it’s simply because of all the memories that I have of my Memere hustling around the stove and kitchen counters that makes it comforting somehow for me to do the same. So last night when I made my family pork chops, it felt right.
Cold cereal for breakfast!
It was a delightful mixture of some of my favorite mix-ins:
- 3/4 c. Natures Path Blueberry Cinnamon cereal
- 3/4 c. Kashi Heart to Heart
- 2 T. wheat bran
- 1 banana, sliced
- 2 T. walnuts
- sprinklin’ of coconut
- 1 tsp chia seeds
Bear with me over this next week—I’m a little scattered and jumbled, but it’s kind of my way of getting through this all.
Thanks again for all the prayers and thoughts.